I went to Twickenham last weekend to watch Irish play Toulouse and practised speaking French all week.  I couldn’t wait to see London Irish again so I asked Mama every single day “Irish?” and every day she told me “Sunday”, then explained how many days away that was.  Eight days is far too long to wait for a rugby match when you’re not quite two years old.

By the time Sunday finally rolled around, I was so excited I woke up at 4am.  Mama was not quite as excited as me and insisted I go back to sleep.  I explained it all – “Irish, Mama, Irish… Bugby. Ball. Tick ball. Frow ball. Big Bob, Digger, dog – Irish!”  Mama put me back into bed and it was still dark so I went back to sleep.

When I woke up next time, we had breakfast and Mama packed the nappy bag and dressed me in my Irish jersey Auntie Trouble gave me for Christmas. I love Irish! We went out to Reading on the tube and the train and when we got there, we saw Big Andy and Trouble and Lesley and lots of other people we knew at the 3 Guineas. Foggy-Balla bought me some juice and I listened to the music on the speakers and sang along with The Fields of Athenry and I Used To Dream Of Irish.

I wanted to get out of the buggy… Mama was inside so Foggy-Balla helped me do that, but my foot got caught and I tipped the table with everybody’s drinks over. Big Andy says he made a mistake catching the table, he should’ve let it fall over and caught the drinks instead. Oops. Just as well I’m only little, I didn’t have to buy everyone a new drink. Foggy-Balla got me a pasty for lunch and everyone got new drinks and then we went to the Madejski so we could see Irish.  I love Irish!

We went into the Cowshed. Caimh was there and he said English was his second language. I know what he means,  Munchkin is my first but I speak English sometimes so people understand me. Duggie snuck up behind Caimh and it was really funny because Caimh didn’t see him. How can you not see a big dog?  I saw Duggie! Then the band played my favourite Irish song, The Fields of Athenry and I sang along and danced just like I do at home. I love Irish!

We met Carrie and Jase and went into the east stand. Bisach let me hit the big drum. I like the drum a lot! Digger was doing somersaults and Irish dancing, I saw a dog on the pitch and then it was time for Irish…  I love Irish!

Irish were playing Leeds Carnegie. Leeds didn’t do very well this year so they have to play in a different competition next year. They were easy to tell apart from Irish because Irish wear green and Leeds wore yellow. Mr Davey and his touch judges wore red. Mr. Davey blew his whistle and the game started.

I will tell you about the scoring sequence and the match in a moment but I’m not quite two and I get distracted easily so I’ll tell you the other things I noticed first. Mama said I must watch carefully to learn things for when I can play mini rugby.

Things I noticed:

1)      Leeds players were very committed tacklers. They seemed to like lying on Irish players a lot and once, a naughty Leeds prop (Mike Macdonald according to Mama’s programme) punched Richard Thorpe and the referee and his touch judges didn’t do anything about it. Mama makes me say sorry if I hit people so I hope he apologised later.

2)      Irish won lots of lineouts. Nick Kennedy wasn’t playing but James Hudson won lots of ball, against the throw too. Big Bob was as good as ever.

3)      Simon played lots of songs on his trumpet. He promised to play The Wheels On The Bus for me but he only played songs to do with the rugby until we saw him in the hotel bar afterwards. Then he played the trumpet so loud it woke me up from my nap (Mama was a bit grumpy about that!) but I like singing and dancing so I was pleased about it.

4)      Peter Richards did lots of little kicks over the Leeds players’ heads then ran faster than them to catch the ball. Leeds didn’t like it and tried to stop him but Mr. Davey said they mustn’t so he gave Irish a penalty try to make Leeds not do it again.

5)      Mr. Davey waved his arms a lot. When I wave my arms like that, Mama asks if I’m conducting an orchestra. Maybe he likes ice dancing where you get extra points for musicality and interpretation?

6)      Irish made Leeds go backwards in the scrum. I thought it would be funny if they rolled over and over and turned into a giant tumbleweed but they just fell over and fell down and I don’t think they understood about musicality and interpretation like Mr. Davey.

7)      Digger was funny. He did Irish dancing, somersaults, breakdancing, hurdling and he was waving his paws at the crowd a lot. I wanted him to come back with Duggie after the match so Mama could take a photo with him but he didn’t. Duggie was funny in the Cowshed but he didn’t dance. Maybe he could get Mr. Davey to give him lessons?

8)      Everyone stood up and clapped when Phil Murphy came on. I like Phil, he picks me up and he’s lots taller than Mama so I can see everything when he holds me. He’s not going to play for Irish next year and I’ll miss him.

Now, the scoring. Leeds scored first. I think Irish thought Mr. Davey was going to blow his whistle because they didn’t try to stop Leeds, but Mr. Davey didn’t blow his whistle until Tom Biggs touched the ball down, then the try was converted. 0-7.

Leeds nearly scored again but Dodge got to the crossfield kick first. Phew!

Faan Rautenbach must’ve been watching Duggie in the Cowshed because he sneaked through the Leeds defence to score a try. He’s nearly as big as Duggie and way more hairy but Leeds didn’t see him – that’s good for Irish! Eoghan Hickey converted it to make the score 7-7.

Topsy scored a try but it was in the corner and Eoghan just missed the conversion. 12-7.

Declan Danaher scored a try in the other corner. Did Eoghan play a joke on them in the changing room? They were making it hard for him and he missed again, 17-7.

Leeds kicked a penalty at the end of the half to make it 17-10 at half time.

I went outside and played bugby with a small ball and Archie, whose second birthday it is today. Happy Birthday, Archie! He was very good at sharing and I said thank you to him when it was time to go back in to watch the second half. We might play mini rugby for Irish together when we’re bigger!

I was tired now and I hadn’t napped even though I normally fall asleep before 1pm. Mama and Foggy-Balla played games with me to cheer me up and then suddenly Leeds’ replacement fly-half put a penalty kick over the posts, 17-13.

Peter Richards did his kick-and-chase thing again and Tomas de Vedia scored a try! Eoghan had put his kicking boots on at half-time and makes it 24-13.

Maybe Eoghan needed a nap like me? He got to go and have a rest so Shane Geraghty came on to replace him.

Leeds made some dodgy moves according to my notes now. Jase and Foggy-Balla were shouting “Crossing!” at Mr. Davey but he didn’t listen and they scored a try which was converted. 24-20. Come on you Irish!

Mr. Davey made up for not seeing the crossing by not also noticing a very flat pass (which was possibly even a tiny bit forward) to Dodge, who scores a try. The conversion attempt hit the post and bounced the wrong way. 29-20.

Simon played lots of songs so the crowd would make more noise. It’s a shame Phil Murphy is on the field because he does a very good version of Wild Rover with his spoons. Mama got the giggles telling Foggy-Balla about Phil’s special lyrics.

Peter Richards did another kick-and-chase – the Leeds players knew he was going to score a try so they tackled him even before he got the ball.  He did a big wavey thing with his arms just like Mr. Davey has been doing, and fell down. Mr. Davey told the Leeds players not to be so naughty and awarded a penalty try. Peter Hewat converts it this time, 36-20.

A couple of minutes from full time, we watched the scrum go in circles. It was reset but goes around again and suddenly Shane Geraghty has gone over the line for a try out wide. Peter Hewat kicked well and the score is 43-20.

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